


the fine line between disgust and thirst

by orphan_account



Category: HLVRAI - Fandom, Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: Anal Sex, Benry is a guy in the same way that a drawing of a person is a person, Desperation, Face-Fucking, Friends to Lovers, Light Dom/sub, Light Masochism, Light Sadism, M/M, No Game AU, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, They/Them Pronouns for Benrey (Half-Life), They/Themrey, benry is large both vertically and horizontally, frenemies to lovers, maybe slightly dubcon. but thats to be added in a later chapter, throat-fucking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:21:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24796096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: “No, man, this isn’tfunny,” Gordon replied, face twisted in disgust mixed with… something. “I’m not laughing. Are you? You’re still being a dick, but you’re not laughing.”Benry grinned, flashing sharp canines, but it lacked the usual lazy confidence. “nah dude, ‘m not laughing. you got ears, don’t you gordon?” Gordon’s face felt scorching hot for a brief moment and he pressed forward again, Benry’s back now flush against the wall. Benry’s breath caught and hitched, their mouth falling open involuntarily, and Gordon froze.Wait. Is that it? Is that what… this is?“Are you…” He trailed off, searching Benry’s dazed face. He was at a loss of how to react here. “Are you getting off on this?”
Relationships: Benrey/Gordon Freeman
Comments: 31
Kudos: 237





	the fine line between disgust and thirst

**Author's Note:**

> yoooo let's get unapolagetically horny up in here. the title is probably a WIP and the tags will most likely be edited with future chapters. don't be fucking weird and share this around with ppl who don't wanna see it. 
> 
> the "plot" added to the beginning is completely irrelevant tbh i just don't know how to just jump straight into porn from the get go ya feel? i know next to nothing about canon black mesa

There were a lot of cool things about working at Black Mesa, and Gordon was well aware of this. Hell, it was basically his dream job, and had been for years - he didn't just get a degree in theoretical physics for the fun of it. It was good for his mental health, too, his therapist always told him, good to keep his hands occupied; maybe the whole super-scary-secret-experiments part wasn't so great, but it was a fair tradeoff.

There were a lot of downsides, too, though. Most of his coworkers were a real drag (though he had managed to get himself a little ragtag group of friends more recently), and the food fucking _sucked_. It was always a little too cold at the facility, and Gordon was pretty sure whatever cleaning products they used were made of raw alien piss.

Benry was a part of working there whom he really wasn't sure was a good or bad thing. Maybe neither? Maybe both? They were a security guard at Black Mesa, but Gordon had a feeling that either wasn't the true nature of their job or they had some deal with someone to stay, since they lived there permanently. Benry was sort of a part of the "science team" as Dr Coomer called the group, but couldn't seem to make up their mind if they wanted to be a sulky wallflower or up in the others' faces 24/7. That was probably the main reason Gordon found them so infuriating, now that he was thinking about it: unpredictability was kind of his worst nightmare.

All of that being said, he did... _like_ Benry. They were a pain, sure, but they were pretty funny, and he guessed it was nice to have someone to talk to about video games (even if Benry's taste was _awful_ , jeez). Plus, they'd been pretty close with Tommy for a long while before Gordon even started working at Black Mesa, and the two of them together were hilarious.

Recently, though? Recently, Gordon wanted to lift the security guard up by their ugly helmet and swing them against a fucking wall. They were always trying to rile him up like it was a second full-time job (and Gordon could just hear the voice of his high school counsellor in his head every damn time: "Don't rise to it"). But the past few days seemed different - it felt like Benry was actually trying to get him _mad_ instead of just frustrated.

Today, they were just meant to be hanging out, the group of them, as friends, having some downtime off the clock, but for the past half hour or so Benry had been pushing their luck to a new, daunting level. Constant taunts, disagreeing with everything Gordon said, physically shoving him a few times (which was new, and a little painful; Benry was a big guy), and they _would not shut up about his feet_. Or his dick, for that matter. The innuendos were no longer innuendos but fully-fledged propositions. GOrdon was intensely pissed off both at how crude and excessive it was and at himself for almost wishing the other man would be a little more sincere, if they honestly had the hots for him. Only a tiny bit, though. And he did _not_ want to think about it.

He looked up at where Benry was now, meandering down the corridor in front of him, the other three no longer in sight up ahead. The guard seemed to be deliberately slowing down and swaying nonchalantly side to side to stay within Gordon's earshot.

"come on, _gordon_ ," Benry yelled tauntingly from down the hall. Gordon grit his teeth; Benry using his actual name was still always a bit unnerving.

"Yeah, I'm coming," he called back, trying not to let the the frustration show in his voice.

"heh, you will be." Gordon blinked and stopped short. Had he heard that right? He'd barely slept for a couple of nights, and this was getting tiring. _Gross_ , he thought, shaking his head as he started walking faster again, _why are they always so fucking gross?_

"Fuck you, man," he grumbled as he caught up to Benry. The other smirked, jogging a little to keep ahead of Gordon and look back at him with that stupid, smug, ugly, _pretty_ face.

"heh, you will be," Benry repeated, raising their eyebrows like the knew they were going to get a rise out of him - and they did.

"Wha--no! Dude, no!" Gordon sputtered, a deep red flush and flustered sheen immediately springing up on his face. Benry just laughed, finally turning around to go and annoy Tommy instead. Well, assuming they ever even bothered to annoy Tommy - Gordon was starting to suspect that that was some sort of special treatment he received from them. The thought almost made him wince.

~~~~~

It was a couple of hours later, when he was on lunch break and had some time to himself, that Gordon realised he may have a problem. Nothing crazy, though, nothing weird: he just... hadn't really been able to calm down since that dumb shit Benry had said earlier.

"And I thought I was used to them being a total ass," he said quietly to himself, picking lazily at his food (and choosing to ignore the fondness that he heard in his own voice for the time being). "Guess they must still be able to get under my skin. That's one thing they're good at."

He felt kind of mean saying stuff like that, now that they were friends. Work buddies? Acquaintances? Tommy and Dr Coomer were always referring to Benry as "our friend", so he figured that was probably accurate, but he couldn't be sure. It seemed like all Benry was interested in was antagonising him.

Gordon was staying over at the Black Mesa dorms tonight, since he had a pretty lengthy project going, and, well, didn't have much else going on back home. Unfortunately, this meant not only more of the highly dubious canteen food, but more of Benry's company since the guard was a permanent fixture. They had said that they wanted to "hang out" for a bit, so the two were currently wandering through some of the spare rooms in the residential block looking for... something. At least, Benry had _said_ they were looking for something - it was starting to look like that was just another way to speed up the countdown to Gordon's inevitable tantrum.

Gordon knew full well that he was acting weird - avoiding eye contact, speaking in short, clipped sentences instead of the usual loud rambling, not being touchy at all - but he definitely didn't need to be reminded of it right now. But no.

"actin' like yer hiding something feetman," Benry was saying as he kicked idly at some nearby supply crates. "actin' suspicious. do i gotta call security on you, bro? oh wait i am security haha."

"Shut up, Benry," Gordon mumbled. He was exhausted, and it was only getting worse knowing that he was going to be here 24/7 for the next few days.

"c'mon, chicken head. you a chicken head? huh? too pussy to tell yer ol' pal benry your secrets?"

He wasn't sure what, but something in Gordon finally cracked. He surged forward, lifting one arm to pin Benry to the wall by the neck. Half of his brain wanted to push down hard enough for it to hurt, but the other half - the one that said Benry wasn't really an awful guy, that he shouldn't be a total dick - was a bit louder.

"Shut the FUCK up," he growled, flecks of spit landing on the other's lips. He did _not_ stare. "You have been pulling this shit with me all WEEK Benry, even worse than usual. What the FUCK is your problem?"

"hah," Benry breathed, eyes flicking rapidly between Gordon's eyes and mouth. They looked suspiciously pink, and a little sweaty. "ya think you're, uhh, a funny lil guy, don'tcha?" They sounded breathless, but Gordon knew it couldn't be because of his arm; he was barely applying any pressure now.

"No, man, this isn't _funny_ ," he replied, face twisted in disgust mixed with... something he'd like to avoid. "I'm not laughing. Are you? You're still being a dick, but you're not laughing."

Benry grinned, flashing sharp canines, but it lacked the usual lazy confidence. "nah dude, 'm not laughing. you got ears, don't you gordon??" Gordon's face felt scorching hot for a brief moment and he pressed forward again, Benry's back now flsuh against the wall. Benry's breath caught and hitched, their mouth falling open involuntarily, and Gordon froze. _Wait. Is that it? It that what... this is?_

"Are you..." He trailed off, searching Benry's dazed face. He was at a loss of how to react here. "Are you getting off on this?"

"haha, yeah." Benry's response was immediate. They were smiling weakly, looking down at Gordon like a drunk, horny teenager. Gordon exhaled sharply through his nose, clenching his jaw as he wracked his mind: how the hell was this going to go? What was he supposed to do? Was Benry even being serious right now?

...Was he getting off on this too?

 _Nope, not dealing with this today,_ he thought as he lowered his arm and took an unsteady step back. Benry looked like they couldn't decide whether to be disappointed or just laugh at him. They _definitely_ had a boner. Again, Gordon _did not stare_.

"You're disgusting," Gordon said, turning away and sighing heavily.

"not cool, bro. very unepic of you." Gordon didn't have the energy to turn around and see whether that expressionless voice was accompanied by any sort of mocking - or, God forbid, _hurt_ \- expression.

Like he said: not dealing with it now. When he walked out of the room to return to his own, Benry didn't follow.

**Author's Note:**

> this was originally written as bullet points so don't go in too hard pls. if u liked it then share the thirst with me in the comments, folx


End file.
